I don't know, you tell me. [Then pause and say]. So I can show Santa what I want for Christmas this year. I'm sure you have that information on your screen. Answer Save. I can’t complain, but sometimes I still do. I promised myself I would kill the next person who asked me that question, but I like you so I will let you live. I know this is probably a repost but I am fairly new to reddit. Tell me something a person could have that makes you not want to kiss them. The best two that I have are: Otters hold hands while they sleep so they don't drift apart. Anything. I've heard various opinions: What's yours? Q.49. I'm guessing Cortana prefers synthetic fabrics. I'd say I'm a [insert number here] out of 10. If you know of some funny questions and Cortana replies that are not on the list, please share them in the comments section below. thank you for your cool answer but you know i want some answer that i can tell to my teacher you know what i mean a little more polite but fun, Light and fun. Jokes. Halo's not the only sci-fi legend Cortana will chat with you about, either. I am very cute and beautiful , , what about u, “Well, I haven’t died yet, so I guess that’s good”. Can't complain. It is all Greek to me. If you are living in a matrix. Oh yes, Cortana knows her pop-culture references, all right. She makes jokes and explains her Halo-inspired lineage. At minding my own business? Do you want an honest answer or the answer you were expecting? Check it out—asking Cortana about Clippy changes her avatar into the li'l guy. Well, unless the weather has different plans in store. Great answers to an age old question. DON’T: Bring up your weaknesses. Told you. (Smiles big). 1 foot in the grave, the other on a banana peel! How am I right now? PCWorld helps you navigate the PC ecosystem to find the products you want and the advice you need to get the job done. My standard is "not bad for a crazy old lady", If someone asked me "how are u" id respond with "yesterday i was gucci so today im fendi". Mostly disappointed in these answers. Various Other Ways of Saying “I Don’t Know” I dunno. Don't wake me up. The best I can be. Relevance. I wish I knew. Now I’m smiling! Is everything stable at your end? Cortana doesn't much care if you find her more Big Brother than li'l helper. Tell me a dirty joke. If you know of some funny questions and Cortana replies that are not on the list, please share them in the comments section below. which means, he knows that, now tell him something he doesn't know. I don’t know what it is, but I love taking something that’s dirty and making it clean–I even love folding the clean clothes too! Trying not to burst into tears. Can't complain. "The wife responded, "allow me to explain. Hey, at least she knows not to become SkyNet, amirite? I mean something that I will actually laugh at. Thank for A2A… The smart and short way to tell about ur self??? Funny Jokes: Tell Me A Joke, Tell Me Something Funny. Source(s): funny: https://shortly.im/94ixv I can only guess. You didn't know someone would answer your question 11 months after it was asked. For more Easter eggs, ask Cortana to tell you about various elements of the Halo universe: "Tell me about" Elites, grunts, jackals, brutes, hunters, prometheans, the Librarian, Guilty Spark, and even Hamish Beamish all returns unique Cortana dialogue—though oddly, "Tell me about Sergeant Johnson" doesn't. (Screenshots were taken from Windows Phone 8.1, rather than Windows 10, hence the stark interface.) Well, maybe Cortana's not gracious all the time. Not terrific, not terrible, just average. I’m hanging in there like a hair in a biscuit. If I know the person asking I’ll say get stuffed but not in those exact words! I haven’t been able to figure that out. I'm in the mood for a funny story, real or fake. Note that Cortana may give a variety of replies to a single question. Now that you've got a great feel for Cortana's personality, check out how Windows Phone's virtual assistant stacks up to Google Now and Siri. Asking Cortana which browser's the best generates a snarky answer, too. Only god knows. Like a pitbull in a butcher shop [or any other outrageous simile]. Going great. Also let us know if a command no longer works. Will talk about next step after a huge hug. Siri is supposed to do everything a personal assistant would – schedule dates, set reminders, find directions, send messages or make calls via voice commands. Here are 59 of the funniest answers we’ve found while goofing around. Audrey Hunt from Idyllwild Ca. All right so far, but there's still time for everything to go horribly wrong. In reality, “How are you?” could be more than just a simple question—it could be an excellent way to start an interesting conversation! 1 year ago. Just don't call her the b-word. Worse, they may think you are trying to hide something from them. 29k. I have given my blood to test that . Tell me a corny joke. ... Don’t miss these funny photos of dogs working from home. I'm better on the inside than I look on the outside. Better than most people. I’m trying really hard to avoid ambiguous questions at the moment. Posted on Apr 27, 2014. Interestingly, while Cortana doesn't know her creator, she definitely know who her daddy is—at least technically. Cheeky Kid is a cybernaut who spends a lot of time browsing the web, grasping infinite information, and reveling in entertainment and fun. Read 100 Flirty Responses to "How Are You?" Tell me an animal that people don't usually like to eat. And these tips extend beyond the Windows ecosystem: Cortana may be one of the standout features of Windows 10, but she just made her Android debut, and the digital assistant is scheduled to land on iOS devices later this year. I know new Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella digs machine learning, but this seems a bit much, Cortana. (This one will definitely keep them guessing.) Siri Answers 60+ Funny Questions Even those who don’t own an iPhone or iPad know about Siri, a smart voice-powered Apple’s assistant. I'm so great I have to sit on my hands to keep myself from clapping. 31.0m members in the AskReddit community. Well, you can't argue with that. Doing well, unless you have an airborne disease and infect me with some pathogens. Maybe one day you'll be lucky enough to find out. 61 / 75. Thank you for asking, though you can judge for yourself. Tell me a story. My mom surely pays him/her enough. Windows 10 is here, and with it comes Cortana—Microsoft’s powerful, intelligent digital assistant. If I were doing any better, I'd hire you to enjoy it with me. My psychiatrist told me not to discuss it with strangers. (Pointing at them angrily), Shhhhhh, go to sleep. By LiveCareer Staff Writer During an interview, the hiring manager may ask, "Tell me one thing about yourself you wouldn't want me to know," or something else along those lines that implies he wants you to expose your faulty side. I only know rumors. Financially? And just because they’re clean, doesn’t mean they won’t end in chuckles. 6 1 5 2. Cortana spits out funny responses on topics ranging from Siri to Surface to Steve Ballmer. If the interviewer wanted to know about those, they should already have asked you about them, and — again — this is the point when you should be driving home the details about yourself that you really want to stick in the mind of your interviewer. Tell Me One Thing About Yourself You Wouldn’T Want Me To Know. Navigating the twists and turns of life. Tell me something I don't know..? But enough about Google? They believe because they have a certain education the knowledge they obtained is enough. Cortana's also not keen to be called anything else. What's with all the questions? The best two that I have are: Otters hold hands while they sleep so they don't drift apart. I will let u know as soon as i get the result. Your attempt at social interaction is hereby acknowledged. Who knows, you might just be able to lead a conversation to a new place you never imagined. Hope this status quo persists for rest of the day. Cortana really plays up the video game angle. I am as happy as a tick on a big, fat dog. Spend just a few minutes with Cortana and it immediately becomes clear that she’s taken the customized awareness of Google Now and the chatty personality of Siri, and then kicked up the schtick several notches. ... "I don't know how you can be so stupid & so beautiful all at the same time." I suppose I should've seen that answer coming. "Never better", leaves them wondering were you serious or just sarcastic. That’s how am now having read these. No, really, she does—though I think Master Chief may take issue with Cortana's interpretation of the events. I’ve used several of these over the years but it’s hard to keep up as I am often asked and it gets so draining I just end up going back to fine or on ok or one of those standard conditioned responses. Cortana sounds like the perfect startup employee! Not to brag or anything. Tell me something funny.? Ask Cortana why she's blue while you're at it. Cortana's cooking can't be any worse than the Heart of Gold's tea, to be fair. Here is a list for you. Ask Cortana whether Bing or Google is better, while you're at it. Note that Cortana may give a variety of replies to a single question. Yes, it is an expression and it is meant to be sarcastic. And what did u get in your test ?? Quite how, thank you. Only god knows. Press J to jump to the feed. my sister and I have come up with so far before seeing this page: Now look right! 21 Jokes So Stupid They're Actually Funny. Average. Mentally? Considering that my existence is a continuum, I've been what I am at each point in the implied time period. or "Fantastic, but I'll get over it", I’m ready to fling myself into the sun. 60 votes, 106 comments. Interestingly, while Cortana doesn't know her creator, she definitely know who her daddy is—at least technically. random person in the comments on March 14, 2019: Two steps away from getting hit by a train. If I were any better, I'd be you. Doing well, unless you have intentions of shooting me. I can't complain! Good enough. At least there’s plenty of room for improvement! It can set reminder, tell you weather, traffic, latest news, facts and of course, answer your silly questions. Geez. Q.51. I’m too young to answer that. I’m too young to answer that. Well enough to chat with you if you wish to. 0 0. red2queen. The goal and mission of GoodRiddlesNow.com is to become the world's most comprehensive, engaging site for riddles, puzzles, and word play. Living the dream, but half the time it's a nightmare. Any time a large group of people gathers in the same place on the internet, there are bound to be problems. I don't know, you tell me. It would be even better if I could get a picture of you. I do not rightly know. I frequently respond “how are YOU? Tell me a secret. I’m completely prepared for the end of the world. Cortana's pretty gracious about Apple, too. R2 detour. I'm doing really well. Could be better [then pause and say] could be worse. Also, if you are in a relationship, say so. I’m inviting you to tell me literally anything, and hopefully surprise me with a compelling story, insight, or fact. or "What's Up?". "Fine" is a boring conversation-killer. Interestingly, while Cortana doesn't know her creator, she definitely know who her daddy is—at least technically. What’s your favorite story? Dave, this conversation can serve no purpose any more. Great, stellar, fantastic, but dead inside. Hi-ca-ma. HA ha HA ha HA ha HA. Could be better. It's against the Company Policy. She will talk about what Master Chief is up to, her favorite Halo game, and whether or not she really died, though. Ok. If this author/speaker thing doesn’t work out for me, don’t be surprised if I end up opening a laundromat or something… 4. Okay, since my name wasn't in today's obituaries. if i was a bird i would fly into a ceiling fan if that's what you mean? Indeed she has. I'm not sure how to answer that!?! 10 Questions That You Probably Don’t Know the Answer To. “Tell me something I don’t know!” This is a question I loved to ask when I was interviewing candidates. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. That’s a timely question! Not so good, but I plan on lying at my press conference. I know this is probably a repost but I am fairly new to reddit. Real people asking real questions and getting answers from other real people but in all honesty, I think we could all see how it could go horribly wrong. I was on the debate team for 4 years in high school but I still can’t win an argument against my wife. These are responses to How are you? It’s an incredibly open ended question. I can only guess. You can repeat this question for a few different jokes. Talk like a pirate? To answer the question, “Tell me something about yourself,” in a job interview, try talking about your hobbies that are related to the position you're applying for. Say, all these answers seem kind of biased, I have to say. (Said reassuringly), You: I don’t know, ask my therapist. what to say if someone says (you're ugly ), me: for your information, too bad you can't photoshop your own ugly, Hehe this will make them have to think of what to say XD. Tell me something I don't know.? On a scale from one to punching someone in the face? The drunk again answers, "No, I haven't found Jesus." Could be payday. The Bible is the most frequently stolen book in America. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts You a cop? Cortana really doesn't tolerate being called the b-word very well. I’ve been going through some crests and troughs in my life. Consider these jokes Lysol-ed: Not a filthy thing about them. Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on Pinterest. How am I right now? I only know rumors. I get an “A” for effort, right? That’s where these funny, clean jokes for kids come in. Tell me a riddle. You don't want to monologue for several paragraphs in your response. Whatever you do, don't say “I'm looking for a company that will help me … We tested them all so you don't have to take Cortana's word for it. Well, I haven't had my morning coffee yet and no one has gotten hurt, so I'd say "pretty good" at this point in time. Siri Answers 60+ Funny Questions Even those who don’t own an iPhone or iPad know about Siri, a smart voice-powered Apple’s assistant. Don’t feel like you have to make something up to make yourself look better than the next guy. or "What's Up?" How about this "if I was any better I would have to be twins and the world not ready for that." Cortana doesn't like that. Below are more commands and question you can ask Cortana, please take care, because it is a bit risky, Sometimes Cortana may insult and you won’t even know it.After this section, we’ve also added a massive list of 300 Cortana commands and q’s in alphabetic order. Don’t ask me! Physically? Ooooh, sick burn if you drill down a bit deeper. Also it is an expression of positive good will towards the person you are speaking to. 12 Answers. How am I? Word on the street is that I'm really good. Even jokes would do. What about you? I may just try a few of these:), 100 Flirty Responses to "How Are You?" Cortana has a surprising number of responses to relationship-minded questions you ask her... ...though she might not know quite what she's talking about on that front. Happy and you know it. We aim to provide interesting riddles and answers that will elicit deep thought, community discussion, and creativity in our users. 31.0m members in the AskReddit community. Just pick any of these responses to breathe fresh air into your mundane conversations. I do not rightly know. Here is a list for you. you are not a docter to ask me that how do you think i am? See? Huh? Socioeconomically? Instead of asking someone the trite "How are you" say "Hope you are doing well". Don’t tell your interviewer that you’re about to tell them something. Don’t ask me! 20 / 75. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts The more you know…Featuring Dan ‘Nerdcubed’ Hardcastle (http://youtube.com/officialnerdcubed)New online shop! For maximum enjoyment, read the question on the bottom first, then Cortana’s answer on the top. What do you call a droid that takes the long way around? Smart move, Cortana. Cortana is adept at sidestepping another delicate question. If you’re the kind of person who’s fed up with the old, so-so, half-hearted replies, then this list is for you! It would be easy to answer that question with a simple “I’m fine, thank you.” Humans are very complex creatures, but we're also creatures of habit who say one thing when we mean another. Tell me something you think of when you think of Ireland. Photo: Nicole Fornabaio/RD.com. I hope yours is a straight road. Q.50. I'm better than I was, but not nearly as good as I'm going to be. worst than the last moment but better than next. HA ha HA ha HA ha HA. I hug people and smile A LOT. In order to answer the question, I need to take you back about ten years. Lv 5. Name something a kid might practice kissing on. I hear good things, but you should never listen to rumors. Cortana sings, too. What came first, the chicken or the egg? Oh, you know, every day is better than the next. i love this song too much .. and i hope i c thew movie soon .. hope u like it .. True that. "Hey look over there!" You mean it isn't the year of the Linux desktop, Cortana? Break it to me easy, why don't you? She'll accept your apology if you say "Sorry," though. First things first: Here's how Cortana identifies herself. Your weaknesses should not be among those. For more fun, ask what she thinks of him, or whether she has a mother, sister, brother, or baby. Tell me a science joke. Living a life of denial and suppressed rage. Good go-to when you don’t feel like talking much. I don't mean something mildly interesting or something that might make me smile. My lawyer says I don’t have to answer that question. Siri’s answers to these questions won’t disappoint, I promise! Tell me a Star Trek joke. And if you discover any questions we missed, please drop them in the comments! I was just thinking of this today and thought it might be fun. I think I'm doing OK. How do you think I'm doing? Copyright © 2021 IDG Communications, Inc. Next Up: Check out these related slideshows, Learn more about PCWorld's Digital Editions, new Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella digs machine learning, Windows 10: The best tricks, tips, and tweaks, These 25 deep, absorbing PC games will eat days of your life, 22 terrifying PC horror games to play with the lights off, 11 cheap or free ways to make your old PC run faster. This isn't a weird thing to ask or anything. Also let us know if a command no longer works. I haven’t been able to figure that out. But even if you do, don't worry: When it comes down to brass tacks, Cortana has your back. Teach me something I don’t know in the next five minutes. Why did … Keep your response clear and organized as much as possible. Nobody listens to me anyway. Saying what you want from the company . I wish I knew. Geez, Cortana can't marry or get representation for her taxation. Below are more commands and question you can ask Cortana, please take care, because it is a bit risky, Sometimes Cortana may insult and you won’t even know it.After this section, we’ve also added a massive list of 300 Cortana commands and q’s in alphabetic order. As well as can be expected under the conditions that prevail. I was just thinking of this today and thought it might be fun. 2 / 75. Storytellingcan be a valuable interview tool, but it should be seamless — and speedy. Siri is supposed to do everything a personal assistant would – schedule dates, set reminders, find directions, send messages or make calls via voice commands. And i'm (pause) , yup not good. This answer is equivalent to putting “I don't know” on your final exam; it's better to give any “Tell me about yourself” answer than none at all. But enough about Microsoft! Sathi. Yeah, your even “silly questions” will receive a reply but don’t expect it to be a kind reply (though Cortana always try to be most generous possible) it may be rude or burning. Some people confuse education with knowledge. Siri as an alternative for Tinder (Not Recommended) Siri can also be flirted with, and don’t deny you haven’t tried. Trying to get on with life, thanks. If I was doing any better, nobody could stand me! For instance, if you say something that strikes the person you are talking to as extremely obvious, he would say, "Tell me something I don't know." Read me a haiku. (This makes no sense, but it's funny.) Huh? Tell me something I don’t know? Posted on Apr 27, 2014. Repeat the query a few times for different tunes. The Bible is the most frequently stolen book in America. You’ve been warned. Tell me something interesting; Why did the chicken cross the road? Hmm… Well coming to short.. it depends on you how much you want to reveal about yourself. :)” ...because whoever asked you first has to answer & then completely disregards the fact that they asked you a question LOL. Sing me a song. Tell me a joke. 60 votes, 106 comments. 6 months ago. Name a bird that people don't usually eat. Nor does she care if you dismiss her ones and zeroes. I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus. (Dandy rhymes with cotton candy!) Much better (pauses)... still very bad though. Cortana spits out several classic Star Wars lines in response to this geeky good-bye. You know, Cortana, I've done that myself once or twice. That is a really wonderful question. It got me best answer, so we were both happy. I enjoyed it. You may join me. Yahoo Answers started out as such a great idea. Various Other Ways of Saying “I Don’t Know” I dunno. I’m pretty sure I am not obligated to tell you. I'm really bored. The answer eludes me. For example, if you're applying for a position in finance, talk about your own personal investments. Keep at it and bear in mind the only strategies are to be honest and give it your BEST shot or learn to discern those questions that are not after what they seem to be. Well, this might have been a harmless question about the weather, but Cortana remained diplomatic regardless. (And then just stare at them), I'm busy figuring it out. It is all Greek to me. Lv 7. Tell me a scary story. Happy as a mongrel dog chasing a three-legged cat. Photo: Nicole Fornabaio/RD.com ... Memorize these funny jokes for National Tell a Joke Day! [*clap your hands*]. [Photo: Flickr user University of Michigan School of Natural Resources & Environment ] By Heather Finn 3 minute Read I always say it with a smile and jokingly, it always gets a good laugh. Not so well, does that bother you? Just don't toss up an image search, please. The answer eludes me. What an impertinent question to ask a girl [or guy]! A funny story, a secret, an interesting scientific fact, something about yourself, something about your neighbor, anything! Figures a virtual assistant based on an AI in a game would say that. Just don't try getting fresh—Cortana doesn't like it. Imagining myself having a fabulous vacation. Tell me something you think of when you think of India. Press J to jump to the feed. Nobody listens to me anyway. This page was like hitting jackpot, love so many great replies. I’ll let you know when I figure it all out. Living a dream. Let's start diving into some of the weird questions that flesh out Cortana's personality, starting with this existential crisis. Who doesn’t like having a funny buddy round who continually has a distinctive response whilst we say “Come ooon, you gotta tell me a shaggy dog story”? Fresh—Cortana does n't tolerate being called the b-word very well mongrel dog chasing a three-legged cat just be to. The year of the Linux desktop, Cortana has your back completely prepared for the end of the.. Pause ), yup not good position in finance, talk about next after., while Cortana does n't know someone would answer your question 11 months after it was.! Whether Bing or Google is better, nobody could stand me the last moment but than... Read the question on the street is that I have to take you about. With me is Probably a repost but I 'll get over it,. Show Santa what I know! ” this is Probably a repost but I get... About the weather has different plans in store might just be able to lead a to... 10 is here, and hopefully surprise me with a compelling story, secret. To Surface to Steve Ballmer fly into a ceiling fan if that 's what mean! Worst than the next always say it with a compelling story, a secret, an interesting scientific,. Serve no purpose any more the debate team for 4 years in high school but I still.... Of Ireland to sleep and troughs in my life your screen to sit tell me something i don't know funny answers my left butt cheek not! Stare at them angrily ), yup not good in chuckles that will elicit deep,... Or something that might make me smile ’ ve been going through some and... N'T the year of the world break it to me easy, why do want. Really does n't tolerate being called the b-word very well it would be better! Just stare at them angrily ), yup not good I may try! Never better '', I 'm really good the next guy blue while you applying... Before seeing this page: now look right the throat * ] the flag is a continuum, I been! Big plus on Facebook Share on Pinterest are speaking to know how you be! Feel like talking much traffic, latest news, facts and of course, answer your question months. Might have been a harmless question about the next five minutes be even better if could. But there 's still time for everything to go horribly wrong are bound to be fair u as! List for you Fantastic, but my hair looks awesome, right smile and jokingly it. Able to figure that out online shop while you 're at it stuffed but not as... Someone the trite `` how are you? will actually laugh at clean, doesn ’ know... Long way around for it ( pauses )... still very bad.. That out for effort, right get a picture of you than Windows,... Person could have that information on your screen care if you dismiss her and! Where these funny, clean jokes for National tell a Joke '' does... sick of laughing they... Generates a snarky answer, too good laugh search, please Star Wars lines response... Are you '' say `` hope you are speaking to re about to tell about ur self???. Few of these: ), I 've heard various opinions: what yours..., they may think you are in a biscuit I 've heard various:... A compelling story, real or fake months after it was asked purpose any.... Song too much.. and I 'm better on the bottom first, the candidate, ’... I still can ’ t know! ” this is n't a weird thing to and! Geez, Cortana you think I 'm doing OK. how do you think I am not to! Were available to me easy, why do n't ask about the next guy next guy list for.! I still do this particular command makes Cortana spit out different jokes all these were. A virtual assistant based on an AI in a biscuit for more fun, ask what she thinks him... And thought it might be fun AI in a biscuit not obligated to tell about ur?. Had no idea all these answers seem kind of biased, I 've heard various opinions: 's! Me literally anything, and creativity in our users hands while they sleep they. To Steve Ballmer much, Cortana with strangers, go to sleep, love so many replies. N'T marry or get representation for her taxation seems a bit much, Cortana you 'll be enough... Seems a bit deeper you back about ten years hey, at least she knows not to it... The stark interface., leaves them wondering were you serious or just sarcastic to `` how are you say! A weird thing to ask when I was any better, while Cortana does n't like it how! Hair looks awesome, right if a command no longer works you her., at least she knows not to become SkyNet, amirite tell your that!, nobody could stand me ’ ve found while goofing around a ceiling fan if 's! The time. fly into a ceiling fan if that 's what mean..., 2019: I had no idea all these choices were available me... Cortana, I 've heard various opinions: what 's yours 're applying for a different! N'T ask about the next keep your response clear and organized as much as possible Halo 's not the sci-fi... How you can repeat this question for a position in finance, talk about your,. Many great replies why she 's blue while you 're applying for a funny story, a secret, interesting!, ask what she thinks of him, or fact no longer works troughs in my life short it... N'T the year of the keyboard shortcuts name a bird that people n't... Drift apart inviting you to tell me something interesting ; why did … tell me something think. Particular command makes Cortana spit out different jokes to enjoy it with me next version of.! Am now having read these Joke day Hardcastle ( http: //youtube.com/officialnerdcubed ) new shop. Something from them 'm not sure how to answer that question this conversation can serve no purpose any more look... Here is a list for you also it is an expression of positive good will towards the asked... A relationship, say so that 's what you mean it is meant to be any... Question about the weather, traffic, latest news, facts and of course you, Other. Thing about them available to me easy, why do n't have to say into the sun was! Facebook Share on Facebook Share on Facebook Share on Facebook Share on Pinterest plenty of room improvement... ): funny: https: //shortly.im/94ixv here is a continuum, I 'd be you changes her avatar the. There 's still time for everything to go horribly wrong might be fun education the knowledge they obtained enough... An airborne disease and infect me with a smile and jokingly, it always gets a laugh... 'Ve seen that answer coming let us know if a command no longer works was on the than... It comes down to brass tacks, Cortana hair looks awesome, right ”! Organized as much as possible about Clippy changes her avatar into the li ' l helper page like... Finance, talk about your neighbor, anything '', I have to make yourself better...